Underwhelmed but optimistic

I am so sorry about the lack of updates after such an important thing as the device being turned on.  I basically went home for 2 days, came back to Baltimore, got slammed with work, went to the library and haven't really left since.  I'm going to go back to the library as soon as I'm done with this post actually, I'm very studious this semester, I hear that's a good thing though possibly.  Ok, so, the activation, it went fine.  Not particularly exciting, definitely underwhelming, but I can actually tell that it will be good.  Here's what happened:




We (my parents and I) got to the hotel near laguardia where the activation would be happening, found the room we were supposed to go to where there was a guy with a laptop attached to a sort of pod about the size of your palm and a little grey thing that was clearly the remote for my esteem.  We all sat down and the guy explained that he would be first turning the device on and doing a test on each of the parts to make sure they worked, I would hear sounds but they would be from the computer and nobody else would hear them.  I had to hold a thing up to my head where the device is and then I heard some beeps.  It was really strange to hear on that side after 2 months, and he confirmed that the device and all of its parts were working, which was a huge relief to me.  Then he started adjusting the volume and such until a point where I heard feedback and then he did a short hearing test for me with the device.  It became very clear very quickly though that the amount of volume he could give me was very very limited because a combination of 2 surgeries and a bad cold had left me with quite a bit of fluid in my ear which causes feedback at certain volumes.

He showed me how to use the remote, pretty primitive and easy, you can only do one "command" at a time, so for example you cannot change the volume AND the program at the same time, you have to do it in 2 steps.  The device can hold 3 programs at one time, so because he had to set me at such a low volume (it's a pretty underwhelming, useless volume right now, on program A volume 4 which is the highest) he set the other 2 programs to be 5 decibels higher each so that as I feel better and as the fluid clears I can at least get a little more volume before I see him again.  Basically it could be a month or 2 before the fluid goes down enough to raise the volume, let alone to full capacity, it could even be more than that, which just kinda sucks but at least it works.

When I am wearing both hearing aids I really don't notice the left side at all, it's basically still turned off as far as I'm concerned when I am wearing the right-side hearing aid too.  When I don't have my hearing aid in though I can tell that there are some sounds that I'm hearing from the device, such as my voice, noises in my head like chewing (which I can hear even when I have my hearing aid in), noises in the shower like the water and the soap bottles clicking open and closed.  It was kinda cool the first day or two but I've pretty much gotten used to it and now it's just getting to normal, amazing how fast we adjust.  I can also hear music a little bit when I'm not wearing my hearing aid, not all of the frequencies which makes it sound a little strange but it's there.

Basically a very underwhelming but optimistic experience so far.  I can tell that the fluid is going down a bit because there used to be feedback when I would lie down and now there is only feedback after I've been lying down for a while or if I'm on one side for a while.  My doctor has also put me on steroids for a 5 or 6 day course in the hopes that this will help the fluid go down a bit.  I hope to be able to get to program B4 ASAP, but so far I've only been able to do B3 for a short bit here and there which is not much more than A4.

In the end I think I absolutely made the right decision trying to keep my emotions neutral and my expectations low.  It's left me not too excited about even the good parts but most importantly I am not disappointed and upset, which is good because I don't have time to be those things.

That's kind of a lot for now, I will try to update again soon.