Stuck in Limbo

I heard from my doctor about my right ear.  They made the 3D modeling scan and it strongly suggested that the right ear has the same or similar bones structure as the left ear.  So much for simplicity.  My doctor suggested I take the weekend to think about what I wanted to do, and I did.  I also went to Baltimore to visit my friends... it was hard to visit and try to make a decision.  After a nice weekend and an 8 hour trip home thanks to 5 hours of traffic on the George Washington Bridge I still wasn't sure what I wanted to do.    (click "read more")

I want the Esteem, but it makes me nervous to let them tinker around with my ears, but the surgery seems straightforward even though it's a bit unique and would require a trained hand.  Eventually though I came to the decision that I had to at least try or I'd always wonder, and that at the deepest level I want this technology and that is the most important thing. 

I decided to talk to my doctor about it on Monday, to ask him some questions about things that were making me nervous but ultimately tell him that I wanted to go ahead.  Then he dropped a bombshell.  Due to various reasons he is no longer performing Esteem surgeries.  I really don't want to go into the details out of respect for his privacy, not that you guys know who he is or anything but I would feel uncomfortable saying more.  Most importantly though he is one of the most experienced doctors in terms of the implant and I have crazy ears.  He suggested, and I agree, that I not put myself in the care of somebody with little experience with the implant because my surgery will simply not be "normal".

So what does this mean?  Just what the title says.  I'm in limbo.  There's a doctor in North Carolina who is as experienced but may or may not be performing the surgery currently.  We're talking to the company to see if there's any way we can work out continuing with my doctor.  We just have to wait and see how this all plays out, but does anybody else think that it's a little ridiculous at this point? 

By the way, my doctor sent me pictures of the bones in my ear but I have no idea what I'm looking at so I'll just have to trust him that they're weird.